#Reduced Guilt Crakers

I’m hitting about two years in my current dietitian position. It feels like I already hit my two year mark because I just had my annual observations this week and I have my annual review in about a week and some change.

It was about a year ago that my roommate moved in.
It was about a year ago that I visited Schlaflys and Royale and Bridge and of course my STL friends ;)
It was about a year ago that my best friend visited.

Oh what can happen in a year. It’s been a rather weird one. I thought that they’d get less weird as I got older. Guess not. But weird is good. Weird is growth.
But weird is still weird.

My position has taught me a good amount in the last year too...
Learning counseling skills up the wazoo, 
Learning how not to let 398# women push me over the edge,
Learning general surgical processes involved in any GI surgery and their feeding implications or malabsorbative implications
...which leads to vitamin and mineral recommendations and their particular timing, dosages, ways for administration
...and feeding administration whether that’s tubes and formulas or TPNs and D20AA9F3 @ 42ml/hr...
Learning about permanent employment and life and politics and the likes. Which is the hardest part to learn, really. 
Learning how to work within mixed matrix management, learning how to do my job while meeting needs of patients, doctors, insurance, bosses, inpatient versus outpatient, time constraints, resource constraints, electronic medical records initiation...

This week was a bit heavy. I think I lost weight from the weight.
Being too busy to eat any lunch properly...
Being too upset to have much of an appetite...
Continuing to exercise like I do...
Running around, stressing out, carrying weight.

So today I haven’t done much at all. I’m coming down from the week.
It’s actually really nice when I’m a little too tired to even feel guilty that I’m not taking advantage of my Saturday.
Because it is gorgeous outside.
And my mother might be, correction, would be appalled by this course of action.
And I’m having Midwest, Irish Catholic guilt. 
Hashtag: Jack on 30 rock. Hashtag: crippling.

But I have the apt to myself today and all I want to do is eat “Reduced Guilt Trader Joes Whole Grain Crackers” to appease the feeling. And rest up.

Rest up for next week. Rest up for my upcoming trip to Georgia next weekend. Rest up for my performance review. Rest up for my Chicago friend visiting the weekend after that. Rest up for my roommates birthday after that. Rest up for my family visiting. Rest up for the holiday. Rest up to take advantage of California. Rest up to conserve energy to start a new chapter of my life at my real two year mark. Rest up for future permanent employment and life and politics.
And rest up for tonight to see Dr. Dog and Lumineers at the Greek..

I'm feeling guilty I finished a box of reduced guilt crackers in three days.
Hashtag: crippling.

I always thought hashtags were pounds on the phone then I realized they were pounds on the body but now we have to use kilograms...
Hashtag: transitioning to electronic medical records.

#learningaboutlifewithreducedguilt